so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
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