who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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