it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize
