Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
