remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
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