At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
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