He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
