Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize