Need sex. Gaining weight.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
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