After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
how drunk are you?
Several
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
