well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
