Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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