the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
