OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
