he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Randomize
