hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Randomize
