I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
this boner is exhausting
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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