Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
