have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize
