Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
dude. I can hear the air.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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