how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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