is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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