I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
