I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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