I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
