have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
