You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
