quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
