Michael Bay diarrhea
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize