Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
