Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
The air was thick with penises
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
