Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
