Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
The struggles of a small town man whore
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
