just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize