I heard we made out
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
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