how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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