i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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