Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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