So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
