You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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