That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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