I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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