its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
