need another drink. this is the easiest way
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
