at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
