i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
