OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Randomize
