And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize