whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
