In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
