You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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