chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
