have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize
