I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
