Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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